


Call of the Sea

by koderenn



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Angst, Dark Fairy Tale Elements, Darkish Themes, Don't get too comfortable, Drowning, F/M, Folklore, Lots of salt sea and sand, Merman Kylo Ren, Mythical Beings & Creatures, Our boy is a bit primitive, Pining, Size Kink, Soulmates, Touched by madness, mention of suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-26
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:42:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 15,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26659147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/koderenn/pseuds/koderenn
Summary: It’s a creature that only exists in tales.In legends.Old, half-forgotten stories meant to be told to children at bedtime.It’s not meant to be lying on the sand before her feet, vulnerable, exposed, wheezing for breath under the relentless midday sun.Rey crouches down curiously.She can’t see its face, hidden under a wild mane of black hair that's splayed over pebbles and sand—but she knows very well that the face will not be that of a normal human’s. Or so she’s heard.It belongs, after all, to a monster.
Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 183
Kudos: 429





	1. Salt

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SavingWhatILove](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SavingWhatILove/gifts), [Silvergrain](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Silvergrain/gifts).



> To one of the most dedicated, passionate and beautiful friends I have made in this fandom! Love you SavingWhatILove! I owe you so much more than a story.
> 
> Betaed forever by MyJediLife!

It’s a creature that only exists in tales.

In legends.

Old, half-forgotten stories meant to be told to children at bedtime.

It’s not meant to be lying on the sand before her feet, vulnerable, exposed, _agonizing_ for breath under the relentless midday sun. 

When Rey had first seen its strange bulk, glistening in the far end of the beach by the rocks and with seagulls squawking overhead, she had thought it was a dolphin. It’s not the first time one gets washed ashore due to illness. So she grabbed a few rags, pocketed a knife and made her way there, bare feet crunching against the wet sand, completely unaware as to what she would come across. 

She now stands in shock over the creature’s half-human body, unable to process anything else from her surroundings apart from the sound of her own rattled breath in her ears. Infinite moments pass by—or perhaps time has stopped altogether, it’s impossible to tell—before she realizes it’s alive, and something inside her jolts her into action.

Rey finds herself kneeling next to it, keeping a safe enough distance, although she senses there’s not much harm it can do as it lays tangled in a fishing net and wasting away like any fish would out of water. She watches it curiously as it struggles for air, its human back heaving in agony, and the rest of its body buried lifelessly in the sand. She can’t see its face, since a wild mane of black hair falls over it, splayed over pebbles and sand - but she knows very well that the face will not be that of a normal human’s. Or so she’s heard. 

It belongs, after all, to a monster.

She glances at the blue sky, sunlit and bright, with only a dusting of clouds in the distance. Nothing betrays last night’s summer storm wrecking the sea village. Nothing betrays why this creature, so well hidden in mystery undersea for ages, has appeared suddenly on land, defying and questioning all narrow perceptions of the world.

She reaches hesitantly to touch its back. The skin is smooth but sticky, coated with some kind of substance that probably lubricates its body in the water. It feels dehydrated under her fingers, rich with the heavy smell of salt and sea. 

The creature stirs, but makes no sound.

Her instinct to explore urges her to touch its hair. It’s untamed, coarse and wild, as part of nature as the creature itself, with seaweed tangled in its mane and seashells nestled inside it. A tiny crab runs down the length of a dreadlock. She leans in to remove it.

The creature stirs again, and suddenly its hand rips through the yellow net, grabbing her thigh. Rey bites back a scream and scrambles to get away, but the large hand digs claws into her skin. She stares at it terrified, expecting blood to start oozing out, only not a single drop appears. The large hand simply splays on her thigh, while delicate membranes appear between its fingers. 

When she looks up, heart thudding against her ribs, the creature has raised its head. A golden iris peeks between its strands, startled and cautious, but above all _intelligent_. It’s not until it parts its dried lips to form a croaked word, that she realizes in dread the creature resembles a human a lot more than she imagined. It’s a word which she doesn’t initially understand. A word from a dialect that doesn’t belong in modern days. 

It calls for help.

Rey swallows, as cold sweat gathers on her nape and temples despite the sun burning on her crouched back. Fear urges her instincts to flee, but she's unable to move. Something in the creature’s gaze compels her to stay. 

She licks her lips. “Don’t move,” she says, tightening her grasp on the knife. 

The creature watches her carefully, ragged breaths wheezing through its lips. It retracts its claws. Rey digs the knife under a string of net and begins to cut.

She’s here to set it free, she tells herself. To help drag it back to sea where it belongs. She would ordinarily call for help, since it'll be very difficult to do it all on her own, but a voice inside her whispers to keep it a secret, that not all people will have the same reaction as her at its presence. 

A creature half man and half sea will either end up being dissected or put on display. 

And Rey won’t have that.

The net around its long, powerful tail is tightly wound. She has great difficulty cutting it without slicing through the creature’s flesh. Sweat drips down her neck and on the shiny black scales running down the lower part of its body. She feels the long muscles recoil at her touch, fighting to remain still in order to be liberated. The creature watches every jerk of her hand intensely. 

“Different, you are,” it rasps in the ancient dialect of her land, as if using air to speak is an ability as strange as walking. She avoids looking directly at its face, at those golden irises that sing so strangely to her. It follows meticulously every single movement she makes, from the bat of her lashes, to the shifting of her bare feet on the sand. The creature’s effect crawls up her skin.

“Speak your name,” it says. 

“You’re in no position to make demands.”

A fang glistens between its lips. “I want it.”

“Yes, well, sometimes what you want you can't have. And this is one of those times,” she shrugs, seemingly indifferent, but frightened of what the tales say about the power the creature can wield over her. She really needs to cut quicker and release it, before it messes with her mind. The muscles of her arm begin to cramp with exertion. 

The wheezing from the creature’s chest diminishes as the nets loosen around its body.

A sudden jolt of its tail fin nearly makes her slice a finger. It flails and splashes against sea and sand, fighting to get into the water.

“Hey! Watch it. I’m not done yet,” she says, pressing down on its lower body with her knee to keep the creature still. There’s only a bit more net to cut off, but it can easily make her job a lot more hard if it gets wrapped any tighter.

That’s when she notices the blood that has seeped through the sand. She follows the trail all the way to an ugly gash under the creature’s ribs. 

“You’re hurt. No wonder you couldn’t cut through the nets yourself. How did this happen?” she asks, snapping her eyes up without thinking. It’s the stupidest thing she could have done.

Her heart stops. Her breath stills. 

Even the murmur of the sea falls away when her eyes connect to his. It’s as if the world gets sucked away into oblivion, becoming a distant memory in the corners of her consciousness. Nothing else exists in the universe than a pair of golden eyes, and a strange connection to a soul that is meant to take all her troubles away and toss them into the waters of Lethe.

“Give your name to me,” a voice calls to her. It’s so hard not to comply. It sounds so besotten, desperate to know her. How can she not grace him with it? It’s the least she can do.

“Rey…” she says softly, as if she’s answering some kind of prayer. 

The man smiles lightly. He’s so beautiful. All porcelain skin and radiant eyes.

He’s the most beautiful man she has ever seen…

A caress runs down her cheek, leaving a wet trail, the kind only teardrops can. Her heart clenches when the caress falls away, like her world is shattering into myriads of pieces.

She blinks, stupefied, just in time to catch the merman raise his human body on his arms, fighting with all the strength he has left to push himself back to the sea. The waves lap at his scales, eager to have him back. 

Rey feels a little unsteady when she gets back to her feet. The last thing she sees, shielding her eyes against the sparkling sea, is a black fin disappear in the foamy waves. That and a trail of blood staining the sand before her feet - the only remaining evidence of his existence. 

  
  
  
  
  


In the next few days, she finds herself thinking about the half-man many times, wondering if he survived in the sea, despite his wound and exhaustion. But then again, why wouldn't he? The sea is his natural habitat. His homeland.

Rey tries to pretend she doesn't look for a black tailfin in the quiet stillness of the waters when she takes her fishing boat out at dawn to gather her nets. She pretends not to wonder if she will ever see him again as she tugs them up, watching cods and anchovies - seabasses if she's lucky - writhe on the wooden deck of her boat the same way he had on the sand. What good would it do her anyway? Thinking about a merman with golden eyes that sing? About the depths of the ocean clinging on his black hair? He might as well be a figment of her imagination. A myth, like he had always been throughout the ages.

But something inside her has changed profoundly.

Rey feels he has taken more than her name along with him. He's taken a part of her soul undersea, shackling it like the siren he is and leaving behind flesh and bones to waste on the rocks, hoping for his return. 

  
  
  


The nets today are covered in jellyfish. Barely any cods, since they can't get caught in the slippery nets. The same thing happens the next day as well. When she takes her meager catch to town later in the day to sell at the fish market, she hears the same complaint from many of the fishermen.

"Maybe it's the seasonal winds," the fish market owner says as he takes the wooden crate from her hands. He empties it on a booth filled with ice, separating expertly the types of fish she has collected. "They haven't appeared yet. It's August, and they're still coming from the north. Who knows what's happening with the environment? Those polar ices melting and all."

Rey shrugs, wishing she knew better as she pockets the few bills he hands her. Barely enough to change the oil of her truck today. So much for buying groceries. "Yeah, maybe. Who knows…”

She can’t help but wonder if the half-man does. The sea is, afterall, his homeland. 

  
  
  


The sun is blistering later in the day, on her way back to the sea village, and the wind that blows through the lowered windows of her beat up truck feels like a breath of lava in her face. She tries not to think of him much. She needs to repair the holes in her nets and scrub the salt from her boat, before it starts eating away at the paint and metal. It looks like she'll have a late lunch today. Something quick like fried fish, and a tomato salad with oregano and olive oil to share with the blind old lady living at the end of her street. Old Maz can barely see anymore. Although she sees well enough to read people’s fortune on upturned mugs of coffee. 

Rey smiles. Everyone needs to make a living one way or another these days. Including a blind old lady that's good at conning people. 

  
  
  


She’s practically in tears when she pulls her nets up the next morning. If this situation continues much longer, she won’t be able to pay the electric bill. She crouches crestfallen on the rail of her boat to stare at the first daylight - timid and pale, barely a halo crowning the horizon, but strong enough to drive the darkness away. It has always been her favorite moment of the day, one filled with infinite possibilities and hope. 

Sometimes it feels as if it's the only moment of the day she can look forward to.

Her boat rocks suddenly, tipping lightly to the left. A sudden smack against wood resounds down the vastness of water. Rey nearly jumps off from fright, when she sees a man in the sea, watching her with his forearms folded over the rail. A smile dances on his face, full of satisfaction and pride. He points at the deck with a clawed finger.

A sword fish the size of her leg sputters on the wood.

“This for you,” he says.

Rey wants to pinch herself to verify she’s not dreaming. She wants to jump in joy and cry in despair, because she was starting to believe he’d been a hallucination. The sword fish barely registers in the periphery of her mind. 

But she remains crouched on the rail, swallowing her heart down and eyeing him warily. Nothing good can come from his sudden appearance. 

"You don't owe me anything," she says. “I would have done the same thing for any being on the verge of dying. Don’t read too much into it.”

The merman clacks his tongue in annoyance. "You not hungry?” 

His golden eyes are set on her, eerie and unmoving, but she doesn’t feel the strange compulsion that she had felt the day she discovered him. If anything, they seem curious. 

“I manage,” she shrugs. 

“Pack of medusa caught in currents. Will go soon.” He points at the swordfish again, a demand in the gesture that almost makes her smile. “This for you.”

It’s impossibly hard to contain a curl of her lips. “Thank you,” she says softly.

The merman nods crisply, satisfied with her acknowledgement. He looks away as his tail ripples the calm waters, disrupting the silence of blushing dawn. He doesn’t seem to be in a hurry to leave. On the horizon, the sun pierces the line between sea and sky. It falls on pearls of water glistening on his skin and lights up the contours of his face. The wildness of nature that emanates from him is the most exhilarating image she has ever seen. 

The need to get close to him overwhelms her.

She unfolds herself from the rail and kneels next to his gift. She senses him watching her as she pretends to examine the fish. It’s the largest one she has ever come across in these waters. It will easily cover her electric bill and still leave her with enough money to make it through the week. 

“Is your wound better? Has it healed yet?” she asks, casually. He seems vigorous enough, so she’s sure he’s fine. But there’s nothing wrong with being concerned, or trying to make polite conversation with a merman in the middle of the sea. Stranger things must have happened in the world.

“Strong I am,” he says, puffing his chest out with air. 

Rey laughs at the boast, fascinated by the similarities they share as species - both in biology and behaviors. She wonders how similar they truly are. How much of him is creature of sea and how much of him….

She averts her eyes, embarrassed from the smug smile that spreads on his face. It’s so radiant, she knows that if she stares long enough she will be blinded. The powers his kind holds on humans has forged legends. She must be more careful.

He lays his head on his elbow, studying her silently for a few moments. Rey wonders if he can hear her heart thud against her ribs in the quietness that surrounds them.

“You alone?” he asks. “No mate?”

Rey nearly gapes at his directness. That was the last question she could have ever imagined he’d ask. She straightens her back, with the intent to draw some firm lines between them. It’s better if he stays in the sea where he belongs and she continues walking on land. 

But a part of her knows it will never feel the same again.

“If I’m alone or not is none of your business. Just because I helped you get back to sea, doesn’t mean you’re responsible for me in any way. I appreciate your gift. I really do. But I think it would be best if we didn’t cross paths again.”

She keeps her tone firm, but her eyes averted from his because she _knows_ how easy it will be for him to affect her. He already is. His presence alone draws her to him, as if he’s the soul she has been waiting for all her life.

"Why?" He demands.

"Because it would be safest for me."

"I not hurt you."

“I can’t be certain about that.”

“I not lie. Look at me.”

“I can’t, you know I can’t…” her voice wavers, betraying her fragile resolve.

The silence that falls between them is heavier than lead. His clawed fingers scrape against the paint of her boat, but he doesn’t do anything to threaten her.

“No danger come to you from sea," he finally says. His voice is that of the deepest ocean, and just as dark. But it carries a promise more solid than land itself.

It makes her feel safe. And Rey hasn't felt safe in a very long time.

She swallows around the thickness of her throat and caresses the smooth skin of the swordfish he has brought her—his way of showing his gratitude. His good faith. Rey wants to believe him. She _wishes_ she could believe him. 

_But can she?_ And where could it possibly lead?

When she finally looks up, determined to ask what he seeks from her, the merman is gone.


	2. Sea

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story has some darkish undertones, my friends, as with all mythical beings. Enjoy!

Rey has never had trouble pulling up her nets, but the amount of fish that get caught in the next few days is absurd. 

She tugs them aboard, day after day, huffing and puffing from exertion and watching her boat practically sink under the weight. Today they’re heavy with sea brims and sea basses, and even a few squids, the best trawl she’s ever had as far as she can remember. Her excited laughter rings across the waters. She can't help but wonder briefly if she should invest in a bigger boat, one that has a separate cabin and storage space for extra nets. More nets is equivalent to more fish - the math is simple. 

But stretching her legs beyond what she can cover would not be easy with an empty bank account. Streaks of luck don’t last a lifetime. 

Rey deflates and continues to haul up her fish, choosing to disregard her optimistic side - until she comes across an unexpected surprise.

Oysters are tangled in the nets, tightly clamped shut and obviously not from these waters, and it's this discovery that makes her finally realize who is behind this strange phenomenon. She hurriedly wipes her hands on her shirt and digs her pocket knife out from her jeans. She sets it between the lips of the biggest oyster, struggling for a few moments to open it up without killing it. It will make for a delicious meal sprinkled in lemon juice later today - one she has decided to selfishly keep for herself. Her mouth practically waters at the prospect of the sweet taste.

What she doesn’t expect to find, however, is a perfect black pearl nestled comfortably in the oyster’s body.

Rey gasps. 

She carefully picks it up, holding it in awe between her fingertips. Its surface is smooth, glowing softly under the sunlight. Its beauty so elegant and delicate inside the harshness of nature, that Rey suddenly understands why pearls hold such value. It’s like a lone flower growing in the desert. A ray of sunlight breaking through the darkness of a cave. It resembles beauty growing under the most wretched conditions.

And the merman has collected handfuls of it from across the ocean as a gift to her.

Her throat clenches, and she looks around the sea with tears gathering in her eyes. Her vision swims. She wants to thank him, to call out to him. But she doesn’t even know his name…

She wipes her nose with the back of her hand, before reaching out for the next oyster. Every single one of them has a pearl inside, in every possible size. She wraps them in a clean cloth and sets them in her backpack, determined not to show them to a single soul, regardless of the money she could make from selling them. 

They are for her, and only her. A piece of ocean to be treasured on land. 

A piece of _him._

  
  
  
  


“Maz? Do you believe that fairtytales have any truth to them?” Reys asks one late summer afternoon, as she sits under the thick foliage of a mulberry tree in the old lady’s yard. The heat is intolerable, even under the shadow - causing sweat to gather down her chest and dampen her shirt. All energy has been drained from her body. Only the cicada seem lively enough to fill the bushland with their song.

Maz chuckles a rough, bronchial sound. “It’s no secret that I was blinded by a nymph at the age of five, when I woke up in the middle of the night to see her sitting at my bedroom window sill. But no one believes me,” she says, turning Rey’s coffee mug upside down. The dark grainy liquid that has remained at the bottom, spills on a little white plate. “Why do you ask, child?”

“Do you believe sirens exist as well?”

The pale white eyes of the blind lady, snap to hers as if they can see right through the casual innocence of her question. Rey flicks off the pink petals of a bougainvillea that have fallen on the surface of the worn out plastic table, trying to seem nonchalant. She doubts she will be convincing.

“Have you seen one?”

Rey scoffs. “That’s not why I’m asking.”

“Have you, child?” Maz urges, a worry in her voice that Rey does not remember hearing before. 

“I don’t really know what I saw,” she tries to evade, but fooling old Maz is not easy. It’s as if she has developed a new sense to compensate for her lack of sight.

  
  


“Don’t try to hide this from me. Sirens and nymphs are not meant to interact with humans. May the fates help us if we cross paths with one.”

“Maybe not all of them are evil.” Rey straightens her back in defense. “Maybe they aren’t the monsters we think they are.”

“Noone said they are evil, child! They simply come from another world. And those two worlds are not meant to come together.” The old lady lays a wrinkled hand on hers and squeezes pleadingly. “If one of them takes interest in us, we can lose our mind obsessing over them. Those entities are very selfish. Their love is ruthless.”

“I’m not involved with one. There’s no reason for you to be so worried about -”

“Stay away from them, Rey! If you want to continue living your life with us, you _must_ stay away.” Maz’s face darkens as if an ominous scene is playing out before her eyes. Rey feels the fine hair on her arms stand on end, as if she’s in the heart of winter and not in the hottest day of summer. “And remember this,” Maz continues. “Never accept any gifts from them or give them anything that belongs to you. Do you hear? Not even a pebble.”

Rey stares at the wrinkled hand covered in dark spots with a heavy heart. She should trust in Maz’s years of experience and strange affiliation to the supernatural, and follow her advice. But it has come too late. Her curiosity and attraction has been too overwhelming. It will be so hard to stay away from the merman if she sees him again.

Rey rubs her forehead with hand.

She should have never accepted his gifts.

She should have never rescued him from the fishing nets or helped him back to the sea.

_She should have never given him her..._

“What do you read in the coffee?” she asks the old woman, a feeling of dread slipping under her skin.

Maz slides her hand away half heartedly, and turns over the small coffee mug. Dark grains have stuck to the inside surface, creating strange patterns and designs that to Rey only seem like coffee stains. Nothing more. Nothing less.

Maz presses her thin lips in a line. “I can’t see your fate, child,” she says after a few moments have dragged by, setting the mug down carefully. 

A light breeze ruffles the mulberry leaves, carrying scents of basil and sea from the narrow stone paths of the village. The cicada continue to trill under the bright sun. Rey waits with bated breath. 

“It hasn’t been decided yet,” the old woman sighs.

  
  
  
  
  


The days go by and then turn into weeks. Daylight grows shorter and autumn fills the evening breeze with the first chill of the season. But the merman won’t appear to her anymore. No matter how much she yearns for him to.

Then the first thunderstorm arrives. 

Rey has grown up next to the sea. It’s as much part of her life as a childhood friend. She knows which days are meant to be playful and carefree, and which days are best to stay away from it. The sea’s wrath is not to be taken lightly. But the sea can be deceiving, even to a good friend like her. 

The winds pick up suddenly when she’s out setting her nets for the evening. She didn’t need the weather report to know that a storm was approaching when she went out to sea. The leaden sky and static in the atmosphere told her all she needed to know. 

But she thought she had more time. 

Waves rock her small boat and spill over the rail, sloshing under her feet. It doesn’t take her long to decide that perhaps it would be best to quit and head the quickest route to land. By the time she’s done setting her buoys, lightning crackles in the distance. The booming of thunder hits just as she tries to turn on the engine. It whines and sputters, but fails to ignite despite her desperate attempts. 

The first drizzle prickles her face. Rey swears.

If she gets caught in the storm…

“Come on!” she growls at the engine, but her threats fall on deaf ears. 

That’s when she remembers that she forgot to fill up the engine with the gasoline she had bought the other day, and that it’s still in the green plastic container under her cot. At least she still has a chance to make it to land alive.

The merman has really taken possession of her mind, she mumbles under her breath, as she crosses her small boat towards her cabin.

But the rocking of her boat is strong, and the deck is slippery and Rey is so much in a hurry to fill up her engine with gas and get the hell out of there, that when a big wave crashes suddenly on the left side of the boat, she finds herself tripping over rope and falling in the waters before she even realizes what’s happened.

Her world disappears into a muffled expanse of grey. 

Cold water invades her body, ramming against her defenses. 

Rey has known how to swim for as long as she can remember. It’s an instinct that comes as natural as breathing to her. But as her heavy clothes and boots weigh her down, and her sense of direction spirals out of control, Rey realizes how easy it is for a split of an unfortunate moment to turn fatal. She struggles in the grey vastness, arms flailing and instincts screaming for purchase. But with her five senses muted and the weight of her clothes dragging her down it can easily turn into a losing battle.

She breaks through the waves, hungry for a lungful of air, just in time to have another one wash over her. She gulps down a mouthful of salty water, straining to see how far away she has been carried from her boat by the currents. She registers the white bulk way further than she imagined, just as another wave brings her under.

If she doesn’t get rid of her clothes, she will never reach her boat on time. And if the waves carry her too far away…

Her mind grasps for images buried in the furthest recesses of her mind. Images of her grandfather. With white hair and beard that matches the foam of the sea, and bright eyes in the cerulean colors that have surrounded her all her life. She can still picture him, deftly weaving his nets together with thick calloused fingers roughened by sea and hard labor, and explaining to her in his calm, graveled voice the angle in which the boat is best to ride the waves coming in with the southeastern winds. All she has ever learned she owes to him. He has been the only family she’s ever had

Losing her grandfather to the sea was the most painful moment of her life. The biggest betrayal from her life long friend.

The irony of her position is hard to dismiss, as her mind whirrs for oxygen and her lungs burn for air on her desperate attempt to reach the surface. 

Rey breaks through the surface again, coughing the salt from her lungs. Keeping her head out of the water is so much harder than she imagined. It’s seeping all her strength and energy. She won’t last long…

She grits her teeth and struggles to remove her windbreaker and boots. The salt stings her eyes. If it’s the sea or her own tears, it’s impossible to tell. She fights to keep afloat. To keep air in her lungs. To swim towards her boat, which seems to be drifting further away with each passing minute, a mere plaything in the hands of the gods. But it’s so useless.

The seven winds are wailing, and the sea is seething and she is so small and insignificant against the raw force of nature that surrendering to its power is inevitable in the end.

Another wave washes over her. The sea devours her.

Rey shuts her eyes, too tired and heartbroken to fight her old friend. It's so much more serene in its depths anyway. So quiet and peaceful. Perhaps it’s not so bad to rest for a bit. To drift with no purpose. 

If only she could share this moment with the merman who told her not to be afraid of the sea. To tell him that he’s wrong. Even the hardest rocks can get eaten away by waves.

But she doesn’t even know his name. And chances are she never will...

Suddenly, something wraps around her waist, tugging on her drifting body. Something solid and strong brushes against her. 

Rey opens her eyes. 

Her vision fills with strands of black hair floating in the bubbling waters, and a pair of golden eyes boring down on her. She barely has time to react before there’s a soft press on her lips. A hand covers the back of her head gently and a familiar presence caresses the outskirts of her mind. 

It calls for her to open up, to let him in, to give herself over. 

To trust _him_ …

Rey has never felt so safe before in her life.

And, as simple as that, air fills her lungs. Once. Twice. Clearing up the haze in her mind. Dragging back the instinct to survive.

She breaths in life. She breaths in her merman. 

She breaths in the sea choosing to help her.

Her merman pulls away to look at her, cradling her face gently in his clawed hands. His eyes are alight with a flame that has no place in such cold depths. 

“I take care of you now,” he says. His claws run through her hair, mixing her brown strands with his black in the currents. 

Around them, shadows swim, indistinct entities that are given away by the shine reflecting from their scaled bodies. More of his kind she realizes as apprehension begins to trickle in her bloodstream. Why are they here? What do they want from her? 

"Do not fear," he says in his deep, rumbled voice. It resounds like the thunders in the sky above. "You with me now." He holds her gaze, imprisoning it under its golden glow and Rey knows there’s no escape. All the tales, all the legends and myths she has ever heard have prepared her for this very moment. To witness the dangerous mysteries of the sea. To feel the monsters lurking under the ethereal beauty.

_To hear their call._

The ocean hums softly around her. The world above is raging, but no wrath permeates the eternal stillness underneath. 

Her heart pounds in her veins, as his tailfin caresses her legs, When his claws dig into her thighs to part them and wrap them around his scaled body, she doesn’t resist. She clings on to the muscles of his shoulders. To the strange power he seems to wield in the underseas. Her body shivers from fear and the intoxicating thrill of being in his arms. 

Her merman leans in to kiss her, filling her lungs with his sweet breath of life once more. His lips are the most wondrous sensation she’s ever felt, molding fragile desire with the visceral need to survive into one long marvelous kiss. 

She melts in his embrace, wishing there was a way to hold on to her merman forever. To find a way to drag him out to land and keep him. 

But the weight of the ocean is crushing her hopes. 

His lips slide down to the pulse of her neck, softly delicately, setting there the most precious and adored kiss.

Tiny bubbles escape from her nostrils - little diamonds that shine in the grey waters. Rey raises her head to watch them swim up to the tumultuous surface, mesmerized. Something inside her whispers she should be doing the same thing. She should be following their lead.

But her merman is holding her tight and there is no place she would rather be than here, in the deepest ocean, wrapped around the scales of his body like an ivy tree.

“My Rey,” he mumbles, caressing his fangs along her skin. A claw slides down her spine - a delicate warning of what is to come.

His fangs dig in.

Rey screams an inaudible sound, before blackness surrounds her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One more chapter to go. Still debating which way the fairytale should end so I'm open to thoughts ;)


	3. Sand

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your thoughts and theories fed my muse and I thank you so much. I hope you enjoy where the story goes!
> 
> Moodboard by the amazing Semperfidani ( I can never have enough of your talent)
> 
> Betaed by MyJediLife. Always!

Her consciousness is fragmented.

Broken down into passing images of black scales and golden eyes, of a tight embrace and lightning branching in the stormy sky. And sea. So much grey sea as far as the world stretches...

Then glorious, fresh air, filling her lungs. 

_“Breathe, Rey…” a deep voice echoes. “Breathe…”_

_***_

  
  
  


Rey comes to with a jolt. She’s in her bed, buried under woolen covers and with teeth chattering so hard she thinks they will shatter. The scent of camphor and eucalyptus are strong in the air, and a silence heavier than a tomb has fallen on her small house. Only the ticking sound of her ancient alarm clock next to her bed hammers in her head.

She wonders what time it is. What day—and if it all had been just a dream.

She shifts under her covers, moaning at her aching limbs.

“Don’t move, child.” There’s a scraping of a chair against the wooden floor, and Maz hovers over her line of vision suddenly. “You’re lucky to have made it out alive from that storm. Poe Dameron found you in one of the caves at the beach in bad shape— half-naked and nearly frozen to death. He’s the one who brought you in.”

“I feel so cold still,” Rey says, shivers running down her body. Her fingertips are numb, and her chest feels like an elephant has been sitting on it.

“Your fever must be going up again,” the old woman fumbles for her pulse before patting her hand. “You nearly caught the death of you, is what the doctor says, but you’ll make it out alright. Let me bring you some soup and the medication he left for you.” She gets off the chair to head to the kitchenette.

“Maz?”

“Yes, dear?”

“How long was I out?” Rey feels as if it has been a lifetime.

  
  


_“When will I see you again?”_

_He smiles, fangs glistening in the faint light. “Miss me, will you?”_

_“Yes…”_

  
  


The old woman smiles at her reassuringly. “Not too long, thank the Fates. Poe found you yesterday morning, the day after the storm.”

“Was I alone?”

Maz stares at her long and hard with those eerie pale eyes. “Did you have company when you were drowning?”

Rey licks her parched lips. Perhaps she should be more careful about what she discloses. As open-minded to the supernatural as Maz may be, it doesn’t mean she will condone contact with the merman. She wishes so hard she could confide in her. There are millions of questions to ask, and no place to look for answers. Rey lifts her hand to rub at the throbbing mark on the side of her neck.

  
  


_“How will I find you?”_

_“Call me. I will hear.”_

_“And what is your name?”_

_A drop of water echoes in the dark silence. “Many names, I have.”_

  
  
  


“Are you hurt?”

Maz points at the spot she has been rubbing. She feels the edges of the bite mark puckered and swollen, and she’s certain a black and blue mark has formed, visible even to a blind woman as intuitive as her friend.

“It’s nothing. Just a scratch.”

“I’ll get you some healing ointment, then. Nothing a little bee’s wax and honey won’t fix.”

Maz’s slippers shuffle away, and Rey waits for her to disappear altogether from the room before she fumbles for a small mirror in the drawer of her nightstand. Her hand shakes, and the clutter she’s making is drilling her head. Α glass of water rattles on the surface, but thankfully it doesn’t fall. She manages to pull the mirror out and shifts to have a better view of the bite mark under the scarce light of the lamp next to her bed.

Her fingers drift over the broken skin.

  
  


_“And do you have a name that I can call you by?” Her heart hammers boldly inside her chest. “A name that can only belong to me?”_

_He stares at her in the stillness of the shadows with a mysterious light dancing in his eyes. Far away the elements of nature continue to rage, but none of their wrath can reach where they are now._

  
  
  


There’s a loud shatter of glass, and Rey snaps her eyes up to see Maz standing next to her bed with a tray of food trembling in her hands. She quickly covers the side of her neck with her palm.

“Who bit you?” the old woman asks, all color draining from her sun-parched skin. “Who did this to you?”

  
  
  


_There’s a scraping of scales over the sand as his body moves further ashore, coming to weigh between her parted thighs. He cages her between his arms, seawater dripping on her exposed skin._

_A clawed finger runs between the valley of her breasts, tearing down slowly the remains of her clothes._

_“Call me Kylo…”_

  
  
  


“Nobody,” Rey says, shifting in the crisp sheets to cover herself and turning her back at Maz. She doesn’t like the judgment in her eyes. “I want to be alone now. Please leave...”

  
  
  


_***_

  
  
  


Sleep is an uncanny entity, they say, birthed from the dead silence of Night and Blackness itself. Its children haunt her and torture her for hours on end, the merman’s name a feverish mantra on her dried lips. Her longing for him simmers in her heart and pools into heat between her legs. A heat that leaves her squirming and writhing in her sheets, drenching them in sweat and heartache. 

  
  


The old woman comes to her bed often, turning on the bedlight to chase away the shadows of her dreams. She lays a bony hand on her forehead to check her temperature and soothe her restlessness. 

But it’s useless. 

Rey remembers every moment she spent with her merman as if it’s happening now. The memories are as vivid and clear as a spring day. 

  
  


_“I like being with you…” she whispers. His eyes are liquid gold as he looks at her. What will she do without them? “Don’t disappear on me again…”_

_Her merman leans in to kiss her, cool pale skin making her body break into shivers. His salted lips are all she needs to quench her thirst, and she drinks them in like parched, broken land._

_Where it will all lead no longer matters to her. She is his for the taking._

  
  


Rey sighs in her sheets.

He was careful, patiently exploring her trembling body, relaxing her muscles, and preparing it for the deed that was to come. There was no escaping even if she wanted to.

She knew that the first moment he set eyes on her.

  
  


_His claws scratch lightly against the goosebumps of her belly, slowly traveling down low, searching, seeking, hunting for a secret place he knows she harbors in her body. His golden eyes follow the trail, simmering with anticipation._

_His pauses, as a claw lifts a dark curl at the apex of her thighs._

_“What have we here?”_

  
  


Rey writhes in her bed.

He mouthed at the most intimate part of her body as if it was a newly found flavor to devour, lapping at her folds and suckling her clit to the point of bruising, bringing her spasms of debilitating orgasms more times than she could count. Her moans echoed in the cave, body pliant in his claws.

She was spent before he had even begun.

  
  


_“You taste sweet. Like fresh river water,” he licks his lips, smacking them, unashamed. “Did you like?”_

_She nods with cheeks aflame. “Yes, very much…”_

_“Good.”_

_He slides back up, black scales scratching her soft inner thighs as he positions himself over her._

_Eye to eye._

_Hard length against wet, raw slit._

_"My turn now,” he says, dark voice dripping in nectar._

  
  


Rey swallows around a dry throat, digging nails into her rumpled bedding. 

His member was long and swollen, protruding on the juncture between skin and scales—an unmistakable evidence of his manhood and desire glistening in the faint light. A reminder of how closely compatible their bodies are despite the eons of evolution separating them.

But when he slid inside her delicate human folds, she reconsidered her previous conclusions. 

The feel of him was obscenely large, stretching her to the point of breaking. 

  
  


_“Too tight, my Rey,” he groans in her ear, their most intimate human parts joining in the most universal way a man and a woman ever could._

_She scrunches her eyes at the slow intrusion._

  
  


Her merman was heavy, heavy enough and strong to crush her if he wanted to, or shred her to bits, take her in the most animalistic ways his nature dictated—and she would be powerless to stop him. A small part of her fluttered with fear at the danger she had put herself in, but the better part was overwhelmed by the rawness of his affection.

Rey licks her dry lips.

  
  


_“Open your eyes,” he says, clawing wet strands away from her face. “Feel me inside you. See me as I mate you…”_

_She does as he asks, locking eyes with the mythical being that is now becoming her lover. His golden eyes are bare before her, consuming her whole._

_She feels him sliding out slowly and pushing back in the rough, basic, primitive movement that has been built by primordial gods. It escalates to the tempo of her heart._

_Rey sighs, giving in to the instincts that bind them both._

  
  


He was beautiful, her merman, his face half light and half shadow as he took her on the rough, cold sand. So much a man—and yet so much a beast. Her body fought for purchase in his claws, her heart sang with unspoken emotion. So much to remember in such a short night. So much to forget. 

Her human body is not built to withstand the love of a half-beast.

  
  


_His thrusts inside her are deep, belonging to the wild creature that he is. Rey pants under him, legs wrapped tightly around a scaled body._

  
  


She grasps at fabric and void air, thrashing her head side to side and chanting his name, _reaching_ for a climax that has no end or beginning. 

He is inside her, filling her to the brim.

They are one. 

  
  


_Her body convulses around him, throbbing euphoria rippling through her in waves. Taking her under._

_Her merman grunts against her lips._

  
  


The echoes of his release mix with her tears and heartache. They stain her sheets and leave her craving for more. 

  
  


_She belongs to him now. They are bound._

_Kylo smiles…_

  
  
  


She wakes from a ray of sunlight falling on her eyelids, slipping in through a crack in the shutters.

Rey lifts her head to see Maz sitting on the chair next to her bed, wiping her swollen eyes with a tissue. Her face is drawn and solemn, as if she has been mourning the loss of a loved one.

“What happened? Is everything alright?” Rey asks in a hoarse voice.

Maz shakes her head and caresses her cool forehead in an attempt to soothe her worries. She smiles, but it never reaches her pale eyes. “It no longer matters, my child... What is done is done. No one can ever go against the will of the gods.”

  
  
  
  
  


***

  
  
  


_Touched by madness,_ the villagers whisper to each other as Rey makes her way down winding paths and stone steps, slippery from the decaying leaves of autumn. 

_An infection of the brain,_ a voice murmurs when she turns her back on the baker’s wife with a warm loaf of bread in her arms. 

_Taken by sea nymphs,_ the old women crouched on a doorstep say, shaking their heads under their black cowls.

Rey believes she has heard every possible theory about her long, mysterious illness that has kept her away from prying eyes for a good part of a month. But with winter’s winds chilling the village down to its bones, not many souls are left these days to haunt its empty crevices, nor badger her with their gossip.

Smoke rises from chimneys, black skeletal tendrils dispersing in the heavy sky, reminding her that she too should be huddled in her tiny home, warming her fingertips against the crackling fire. But there is a restlessness that has taken over her body lately. An unexplained need to be close to the only element of nature that she can share with her merman.

The sea.

The creaking of wood under her boots make a few of the fishermen on the dock raise their head in her direction. Today is no different than any other day she has come to sit at the end of the pier to stare at the fading shades of blue on the horizon. She sits, in hope to catch an out of the ordinary ripple in the calm surface of the sea, or an infinitesimal disturbance in the rhythm of the waves that could imply his presence.

He had said he would come to her if she called. 

But he is nowhere to be found again.

  
  


_“Is there a way for you to walk on land like in the fairytales?” she asks in the stillness that surrounds them, the evidence of their lovemaking still recent on her body._

_“Be like you?”_

_It’s a child’s wish, she knows, but the desire burns in the pit of her heart like nothing else she has ever felt before. She wants to keep him. “Would that be so bad? If you could come and live with me?”_

_A shadow crosses his features._

  
  


"When will the storms return?” Rey asks one of the fishermen on the docks. He is old, like her grandfather, and he probably knows the tales of the sea. She presumes he must have answers to her questions that he is too wary to discuss. “They bring the sirens close to shore. Do you think it might be long before the winds pick up?"

He eyes her compassionately from under his sea cap, all crinkled sharp eyes and coarse beard, dipping his hand in a bucket to pull out a fistful of squids. A good catch for the day. 

“Maybe you should rest a bit more,” he mumbles, the butt of a cigarette hanging from his bottom lip as he goes through the squids one by one, separating them by size. “You haven’t recuperated from the fever yet. I’ll tell Dameron to take you home. The boy will be more than happy.”

“I don’t need to _rest_ . I only need to go back to sea and start making an earning for myself again. I only need a boat,” she points at the waves rippling under the winter sun. _To search for him, s_ he barely stops herself from adding. She feels so frustrated, roaming around without purpose.

Perhaps it’s privacy that Kylo seeks. He is meant to be hidden from the human eye, after all. 

“You need to stay away, is what you need to do, girl. I ain’t gonna be fishing your body out from those waters, if I can help it. I owe it to your ol’ man,” he growls, wiping his nose on the color washed sleeve of his heavy windbreaker. His hands are stained in ink.

“My grandfather didn’t raise me to be stuck uselessly on land.”

“Ol’ Kenobi didn’t want you following him to his death either.”

“I know how to take care of myself.”

“Maybe that’s true. But it don’t change the fact that no one around here will risk his boat to find out,” he shrugs, reaching for another handful of squids from his bucket. “Go home.”

Rey wants to scream at the ease with which she’s shrugged off. She presses her lips in a hard line and narrows her eyes at the playful waters.

So, her boat is gone.

Swallowed by the sea in one of its infamous fits of rage, like so many other boats before hers, rotting away in its insatiable depths for hundreds of years. The sea makes no discrimination to wood or enhanced steel if its temper is running short. Nor does it care if it leaves humans bare handed and with no means to survive.

Her boat had been her only source of income.

She is left with nothing.

  
  


_“You not ready to be with me,” her merman says. She stares up at the shadows of his face. At the shark teeth that protrude through his wild mane, decorating his head like some primitive crown of the undersea. They match the sharpness of his gaze._

_She scrunches her brow. “Of course I’m ready. Why don’t you believe me?” Her decision is as solid as the rocks beneath her body._

_“No,” he snaps, pushing himself back into the water. He averts his golden eyes from her. “You still holding on…”_

_"Kylo, wait!"_

_She crawls on the sand after him, splashing into the water lapping at the shore. But she is too late. Her merman swiftly disappears under, as if he was never there._

  
  


The pain that rips through her is too much to bear.

“You lied to me!” She screams at the top of her voice, scraping her throat and lungs. “You said you wοuld come to me if I called. But you _lied!”_

A few fishermen turn to look at her in response, and seagulls squawk in the distance. The winter sea continues to ripple and foam unperturbed, indifferent to the anguish of an insignificant human.

She wraps her grey knit sweater tightly around her body, clutching a strand of black pearls in her hand as if they are praying beads. She’s aware they won’t bring any comfort to her—it's more of an instinctive gesture rather than anything else—but she needs to hold on to _something_. 

“He will come to me,” she mumbles to herself. “He has to…”

Although deep down she knows that he is as unpredictable as the element he comes from.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We all know he won't leave her hanging for too long, but will he give her what she's searching for?
> 
> A side note to say that the story is essentially complete and updates will come in soon enough. Can't wait to hear your thoughts and speculations as always!!
> 
> You will find me as koderenn on Twitter and Tumblr 🌊


	4. Fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few more questions being raised, a few riddles getting in the way...Although something tells me you have more answers than Rey does.
> 
> Betaed by MyJediLife.
> 
> Valuable help in creating Kylo's eeriness came from my Tumblr friend @silvergrain-in-the-dark. Check out her amazing photography!!

[](https://imgur.com/feDq2Mb)

The conviction Rey feels during the day disappears at night, leaving her hollow and empty. 

She replays their moments together again and again in her mind, a broken song she’s obsessing over stuck on repeat. He’s consuming her, just like all the thousand year old stories have warned her he would. Sometimes she barely recognizes the face staring back at her in the mirror. It’s pale, with dark circles under the eyes, her cheeks no longer have the sunkissed rose color of summer, and her hair doesn't shine in the light. 

He will barely recognize her if he sees her.

He might not even want her anymore.

_Perhaps he was never there to begin with,_ a voice whispers.

Rey shuts her ears to the twisted susurrations, at the ghost staring back at her hollow and drawn, dragging her down to dangerous places. 

She tries to hold on to hope—although she begins to wonder about the nature of this traitorous emotion, that as the tales say, remained locked in a box. It seems no different than its evil counterparts roaming the world. 

When she prepares for bed that night she goes about it in her usual mechanical way, born out of habit and repetition. She shuts off the rambling of the television, disperses the coals of her fireplace and locks the door. Not that it would make much difference if someone wanted to break in—but at least it gives her neighbors a reason to knock.

A clap of thunder resounds in the distance, reverberating down to the foundations of her soul. A storm is approaching, but Rey chooses not to give it much thought as she gets into her cold bed and turns off the light. She slides her hand under her pillow to clutch at the black pearls nestled underneath. She fingers them one by one, eyes wide open, watching the shadow of tree branches waver outside her window. Their eerie dance continues well into the night.

Next thing she knows, she is startled from her slumber by the rattling of shutters. She must have fallen asleep without realizing it. She rubs her eyes and stumbles out of bed in a hurry to shut them tight, mind still hazy from sleep. She doesn't hear the light knock on her front door until she's halfway back to bed. 

She stills, instincts on alert. 

It didn’t have the urgent sound of a neighbor in distress, nor the hesitancy due to the late hour. It was strong and precise—demanding almost. 

Her home is small, consisting of a bedroom and one common room which is taken up mainly by a kitchen and table—so she pads across in a matter of instants. The fireplace in the corner still simmers with bright red coals, but it doesn’t do much to battle the cold drafts slipping in.

She's standing at the door, with a handknit cowl over her shoulders when the third knock comes.

"Who's there?" her voice wavers.

A pause before the answer rumbles in a deep voice along with the falling of thunder. It carries her name.

She unbolts the door and opens it fast enough to rip it from its hinges. Lightning rips the night and envelops a tall man standing outside, drenched to the marrow and dressed in mismatched, tattered clothes that look as if they are moments away from disintegrating altogether. He is a terrifying sight, dragged from the black pits of Tartarus itself, but Rey isn’t afraid—because when the man sets his eyes on her, she feels her soul will fly into his hands.

"I come in?" He asks.

Rey thinks her mind has forgotten how to form words.

She nods, with her heart lodged in her throat, and steps aside for him to come inside.

He crosses the threshold, barefooted, stepping from the frigid rain into the warmth of her humble home, with a curious interest.

They stand across from each other, with his eyes sweeping every crack and niche as if the architecture of a ground house made of stone is as foreign a concept as a snowflake in the middle of the Sahara. She stares at him as if a dream is being brought to life. She pinches herself under her cowl to make sure she’s not still sleeping. 

When his curiosity is sated and he returns his attention to her, she feels her heart will burst from anticipation.

"This your home?" He finally says.

She blinks at him a few times. "What's wrong with my home?"

"Small it is."

"Well, I never claimed to be rich. I fish for a living, if you haven't noticed."

He cracks a wide smile that dimples his cheeks. "I do too," he concedes.

She tries not to smile back, despite the burst off fluttering in her belly. She had envisioned their first exchange a bit differently. “I guess we have _that_ in common, at least.”

“I better fisher than you, though,” he continues to tease, his smile even more radiant on his face.

That’s when she notices that his fangs are gone. And so are his claws.

He studies her closely as the implication hits her suddenly, making her mind spin with possibilities. She must still be dreaming, there’s no other explanation. A merman doesn’t suddenly walk on land any more than fish do. Although, if someone had told her months ago that sirens exist...

Rey coughs nervously, wrapping herself tightly in her cowl and averting her eyes from the intensity of his gaze.

_She must not hope, she must not hope, she must not..._

"Are you cold?" She says in a hoarse voice. She hurries to the fireplace and crouches to stoke the coals. "I don't have a change of clothes for you, but I’ll get you a blanket to cover yourself for the time being so you can get rid of those rags,” she pauses and turns to him, a morbid realization crossing her mind. “Where _did_ you find them anyway?"

He glances down at them curiously. "A shipwreck," he says, as if it's the most natural explanation.

Rey tries not to think of what that entails. She gets on her feet, the coals blazing into a small fire after adding some wood to it.

"Right. Well…” She wipes her hands on her nightclothes. “Are you tired?" 

He shakes his head, black strands coming to cling on his neck.

"Are you hungry? I have some spinach with rice—"

He shakes his head again, black eyes on her.

"Is there anything else that you... need—?"

A second goes by before he curls his lips. "I come for you... You called."

Heat throbs suddenly between her thighs. The intensity is so overwhelming it makes her knees go weak. She takes a step back. 

“It took you long enough.”

“It did,” he says casually.

“Is that all you have to say for yourself?” She tries to sound stern, but her voice cracks with emotion.

“Want more, do you?”

"I have called, and called, and called for you so many times. You said you would come if I did, and it has been _months._ "

"I am here now."

"It's not the _same._ Not after the way you left me!" Gods, the stoic expression on his face is driving her crazy. Can't he see how tormenting it was for her to be stuck on land and knowing that their most intimate moment had ended in bitterness? In _abandonment_. "You fucked me and disappeared without a single trace. And now you appear suddenly out of nowhere. Why? Why did you come back now? What made you change your mind?"

Somewhere deep inside she feels there’s no point in asking such a question to a creature of the sea. That their emotions and decisions might be as wavering as the waters they come from.

He takes a step towards her, not giving her the answer she seeks. His emotions and thoughts are as indecipherable as the unfathomable depths of his black eyes.

_God, those eyes..._

"And what does this even mean?” she gestures wildly at him. “You look like a man. You walk like one. Your scales are gone, and so are your fangs and claws. And your eyes…”

He’s a perfect human, and she is more afraid to approach him now than when he was a monster of the sea.

“Not like my eyes?” he arches his brows. 

“No. _No._ They’re fine. That’s not what I mean.”

“Want my claws back?’ He tries again.

“You are missing the _poin_ t,” she huffs. She rubs her forehead, trying to hide her frustration. Trying to hide her fears. What will she do when he leaves her? What if she never sees him again in her life? 

He has given her nothing.

She senses him step closer. She knows this because she smells the fresh scent of rain, mixed with that of the ocean. And then he’s wrapping those large hands around her shoulders, running them down her arms.

“You humans so confusing. You ask for the world but you not know what to do with it.” He laughs heartily, all sparkling eyes, playful like a summer sea. He laces their fingers together, pulling her to him. “You called me. I am here. What will you do now?”

“Keep you,” she says in a frail voice. Who is she trying to fool? “I want to keep you here with me.”

“In this home? I too big to fit.” He continues to smile at her teasingly, but a shadow passes his face, a cloud disrupting the endless blue of a bright day. 

“Then we’ll make another,” she tightens her grasp on his hands. She so wants him to stay. “One that we can make together, brick by brick. If you have found a way to walk on land that means you can stay. Right?"

He hums, smile falling into a smirk and then gradually disappearing altogether. His face smoothes into a solemness that makes her heart begin to ache.

No, her merman doesn't intend to stay.

His dark, human eyes, roam her face and come to settle on her lips. "No more words. I not here for empty words."

"Words aren't empty when they express what we think and feel."

"They are if we not show. You ask to keep me but you always afraid of me. I not run away. You push me away."

"I don't—" She begins, but pauses, his directness having caught her off guard. "I don't push you away. I—"

"You cannot hide. Not from me."

She feels his dark eyes on her, but she doesn't raise hers to meet them. Tears are beginning to brim, settling heavily on her lashes. 

"You want a human. I cannot be one."

"You are now…" Her lip trembles.

"I must go back. I cannot stay."

"Why not?" Her voice cracks and falls into a whisper.

He caresses her hair, her face, her salted tears spilling over. "The sun cannot rise from the west, and a river cannot return from ocean to land," he says softly. "It is the way."

Rey sobs into his hand. He's talking in riddles, and she doesn't understand a word. All she knows is that she can't have him. That he will go back to his element and she will stay behind, searching the waves, aching for his return forever.

It’s not fair.

What he has done to her is not fair.

"How could you do this to me? Enchant me, put me under a spell, knowing that in the end I would suffer because of it? How could you be so selfish?"

"And what of the spell you put on me?" His soft voice vibrates inside her. "You no different than I..."

Rey futilely tries to stop her river of tears from falling. He caresses them away, cradling her face in his hands, and waiting for her sobs to subside. When she finally raises her eyes to meet his, there's a need inside them, a despair all of their own.

"You don't intend to see me again, do you?" She can see it all clearly now. "It's as painful to you as it is to me."

His thumb strokes her cheek in reply, dark sad eyes continuing to bore down on her. "We not have much time…" is all he says.

Rey wants to pull away. There are so many things left unsaid between them, and they just keep piling up. They will both suffocate under the weight. But she nods instead. She doesn't know what kind of borrowed time he’s on, or how long it will be before she ever sees him again. _If she will at all..._

He leans in for a kiss. 

His lips are so soft when they find hers, and so much desire and want come from him that it’s impossible not to respond. Her hands smooth up the planes of his chest, and his arms wrap around her body, pressing her against him. It’s all she has wanted and ached for in endless weeks. 

She could pretend he’s a real man for a little while. That he has magically turned into a human and come into her little home to spend the rest of their lives together. To live happily ever after, because that’s how all tales end these days. 

His lips descend down the column of her neck, to suckle on the mark he has made on her. Rey sighs into his thick, tangled hair, inhaling his wild scent and holding it in. 

There’s nothing wrong with pretending.

For just a little while.

“We can go into my room,” she whispers, digging fingers into his wet strands and tugging for a moment of his attention. They will never get there if things escalate between them. “My bed is small, but I'm sure we can figure things out.”

The puzzled expression on his face when he looks up is that of a young boy. “A bed?”

Rey smiles against his lips. “It’s warm and comfortable, you will like it.”

“Warm and comfortable here,” he says, tightening his hold on her. “I not go anywhere else.”

The heat from the fire is already drying him up. His hands feel warm, and rose color is staining his cheeks. Rey figures the fireplace and the worn-out pelt in front of it will have to suffice. 

“Alright,” she nods in a hushed voice. “The rug will have to do.”

His movements are uncertain, as if he needs to think twice about how to go on about kneeling down with her in his arms. She finds it endearing seeing him so out of his waters, so she decides to take matters into her own hands.

His black hair spills on her plain rug like ink when she lays him down, pressing her palms lightly against his chest to guide him. His eyes remain locked on her, unwavering, set on her face in complete trust, as he allows her to remove his tattered clothing. She does so slowly, enjoying every bit of human skin that is revealed, down to the toes of his large bare feet. 

When she removes her nightclothes over her head, his gaze drops to her breasts as if it's the first time he sees them. Cold air mixed with heat from the fire make her nipples pebble. She wants his warm mouth to suck on the puckered buds, she wants to feel every inch of him that is human and warm wrapped around her, buried inside her, molding her to him as if they could stay this way forever. 

Their worlds are impossible to bridge. Rey understands that. But they can pretend it can be done for this one night.

His broad chest rises and falls in shallow quickened breaths, his naked body is formidable but tense as it lies sprawled on the floor. His dark eyes watch her every movement carefully, simmering coals of desire mixed with trepidation.

He is nervous.

Her eyes fall on the single tear that glistens on the tip of his cock. His erection strains, as she runs her hands up the muscles of his thighs.

She bends over and wraps her mouth around it. 

The groan he lets out reverberates down to her throbbing core. She feels him shift hurriedly to watch her on perched elbows, the muscles of his abdomen tight with coiled energy just waiting to be unleashed. She can't help but wonder as she runs her tongue along the thick vein of his shaft, how different the sensations might be in this body for him. How fascinating or overwhelming - or maybe even frightening.

He drops his head back, mouth slack with unuttered pleasure. She takes it as a sign to take him deeper into her wet mouth.

He’s large and thick, a definite challenge to take him all in, but she knows he’s enjoying it. She can tell by the sound of his heavy breathing, the urgency of the small shove of his pelvis against her mouth, the way he grunts when he hits the back of her throat.

She will take everything that he has to offer her tonight, swallow it and make it hers, because she knows that he will walk out on her in the end — in every sense. And she doesn't know if she has it in her heart to forgive him this time. 

His hands come to grasp the side of her head, probably to show her the rhythm with which he wants to fuck her mouth. Rey senses it won’t be long before he comes. But she’s lifted off him suddenly, unexpectedly. She blinks at him, confused, because no spend comes dripping down his cock, only a string of saliva that connects her to him.

He swallows thickly, his human Adam’s apple bobbing lightly under the orange glow of fire. His black eyes are blown wide with unshed emotion. 

“I want to see you,” her merman pleads, caged inside his human confines.

He’s enveloped in flames, so far away from anything that is familiar to him, battling with elements that are his opposite in nature. He looks so lost and alone that something inside her cracks.

She crawls up the muscles of his body, eager to soothe his fears. “I’m here,” she caresses his black hair. It feels salted and coarse as it dries for what must be the first time in his life. “I’m right here with you. You’re not alone,” she says softly.

He stares back at her, black eyes swimming in vulnerability. “Neither are you…”

When he reaches up to kiss her, full of hunger and desperation, her heart is already beating painfully inside her chest. He finds her hands and laces their fingers together, the intimacy of the gesture too precious and fragile for the precarious way she had been dealing with his visit.

She looks into his eyes, at the sincerity and rawness staring back. 

The want.

_The black depths of his adoration..._

How could she have been so blind? So self-absorbed? Asking and demanding what he had been giving her all along?

"I love you…" her merman whispers, touching his forehead to hers. His lip trembles lightly. “I not _lie_ …”

Her heart weeps.

Rey doesn't say anything back. She only shifts slightly on top and aligns her slit with the velvet head beneath her. She sheathes him down slowly, throbbing walls stretching around his cock carefully, watching him melt before her eyes.

"Let me be the one to show you now," is all she says in a breath, when he is fitted well and fully inside her.

His heart thuds under her hand as she presses him back on the floor, steadying herself and preparing to ride him. His large hands run delicately up the sides of her ribs, coming to feel her breasts. To cup their soft flesh in his warm palms. 

He is big, her merman. In every way. From the size of his thick cock to the weight of his golden heart. And he belongs to her now as much as she belongs to him.

Their coupling this time begins as something slow, tender, swelling with unspoken emotion and unsated desire. She rocks her body over him, eyes locked together as they build and escalate their rhythm steadily, in perfect unison and control, until moans fill the crackling silence and sweat glistens on their skin. 

“I will miss you…” she whispers at some point, her voice thick with all things left unsaid.

Her merman pauses all movement and continues to stare at her with eyes darker than a black sun, flames licking his irises, burning her up. Something inside them suddenly falls apart. 

He pulls himself up, wrapping strong arms around her body and grasping onto soft flesh tight enough to form bruises. He fills his mouth with her breasts, and suckles on her nipples grinding her against him heedlessly. Desperately. Chasing after a culmination that has her spasming around him in silent cries. He holds on to her through them all, swallowing them down with hungry kisses.

And when she is done and sated and complete, he lays her down and fills her up with his cum in a few surging, powerful thrusts. 

It has all been perfect. It has all been as it should—ecstasy ripping their bodies and setting them aflame.

And eyes locked together till the very end, seeing each other’s world come undone all the way down to the elements they are made of. 

Breath, skin, sweat. And fire…

They are the same.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I believe you know where this will lead. You have all been feeling it from the very beginning. But under what circumstances? And most importantly, why?
> 
> The last chapter will be up soon enough, my friends. Thank you for reading!


	5. Breath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Believe in fairytales my friends ❤
> 
> Betaed by MyJediLife
> 
> Breathtaking moodboard by my friend Silvergrain

She realizes he is gone because she feels cold.

The fire has burned down to embers and ashes, and the heavy blanket is not enough to warm her anymore. She raises her head to look around, hoping to find her merman shuffling awkwardly in his human body in search of food, or maybe relief of a bodily function he knows nothing about. But deep down she knows that she's alone once more.

She sets her head back down slowly. His scent still lingers on the pillow, reminding her of all the things she can't have anymore. The aftermath of their night together begins to settle in as numbness.

Did he set a kiss on her lips before he left? A last caress of her skin?

She can’t help but wonder what his thoughts were as he shut the door behind him. If he hesitated a little at the doorstep. If he looked back...

Part of her is mad at him for not waking her up to say goodbye, but part of her knows—the logical part— that it would have only made their parting more difficult to bear. She understands that she must move on, that time heals all wounds and hers are no different than those of any other broken heart in the world.

Only her wounds have not been made by a simple man.

It's impossible to let go.

He came to find her in the form of a human. It must mean something. She can't help but feel that she’s missing something crucial. An important piece of puzzle that will help her put together what seem to be random parts of a mystery.

She shifts under the covers, turning towards the remaining heat drifting from her fireplace.

How did he manage to become human anyway? To walk on land. What kind of strange magic does the undersea hold that her world can’t possess? And what kind of magician is powerful enough to wield it?

_“Many names I have…”_

She stares at the empty coals as if they could give her the answers she’s searching for about the mythical creature that had come undone in her arms in the form of a human. He had said that he can’t be a human. That it was not the way. Rey wonders if there is indeed a way for them to be together, and what it could possibly be. But she's certain he would have said something if he knew.

She presses her lips tightly and throws the covers off to get on her feet. No. She can't go down that road again. She has wrecked her mind for too long searching for such answers, and all she has come across are dead ends. She makes her way to the bathroom to clean herself up, wincing at the aches running down her body. He had taken her hard on that floor, proving to be quite the animal regardless of his shape or form. The residual throb between her legs reminds her of that very well.

The fluorescent light stings her eyes when she turns it on, accentuating the pain in her temples. She’s not surprised that a headache is creeping in after such a night. How much did she sleep anyway? Two hours? Three? It’s barely dawn outside judging by the timid light falling through the small window.

It must not be long since he left...

Something inside her sinks at the thought.

Is this how life will be without him? Will her mind always drift back to the small moments they shared together as if they have been a lifetime? She can barely wrap her mind around the fact that he has just left, how will she manage to get through the next days, or weeks, or years knowing she might not see him again?

She has done that. She knows what it’s like.

Rey lifts her gaze to the reflection staring back at her. God, she’s a mess. Her face is streaked with dried up tears and her hair is a disaster. No wonder Kylo walked out without saying goodbye, she muses to herself. She grabs a brush and starts running it through her hair to tame it. She’s in the process of pulling it up into a bun at the top of her head in order to wash her face when her eyes fall on the bite mark on her neck that has had such trouble healing. Her fingers drift over the patch of broken skin that has a pinkish color to it. It feels tender and raw, especially after the way his lips had sucked on it the night before.

She leans in closer to examine it under the bright light.

Her breath hitches.

A clanking noise resounds in the bathroom as her brush falls to the ground.

Rey stumbles back with wide eyes.

***

The cold is bitter this early in the morning, slipping through the fabric of her nightclothes and biting at her bare feet as Rey runs down the slippery steps of the village like the wind. Her heart thuds in her chest, and her breath feels on fire as she hurries down winding paths. Protruding rocks cut her feet and splinters of wood dig into her soles. Blood stains the stone steps behind her.

But Rey doesn’t care.

All she cares about is reaching the sea. All she cares about is finding him.

She knows that he will hear when she calls. He has been listening all her life.

_“Call me. I will hear…”_

Nothing has been more constant in her life than the sea. It has been her best friend growing up. Her closest companion.

And now…

“Watch it, girl!” Mr. Plutt, the chubby owner of the bakery protests as she falls on him after rounding a corner. She nearly brings him tumbling down. “Have you lost your mind? What're you doin' up this early?”

“Have you seen a strange man around? With long black hair and ripped clothes?" she extends her hand to help him to his feet, despite how much in a hurry she is.

“A bagger?”

“No, no… Nothing like that.” Rey cringes at the description she gave. Who knows where his mind will go.

"Haven't seen a soul," he puffs out, brushing off dirt from his knees.

"Are you sure?"

"I ain't blind!" He fumbles around for his glasses, which are perched on his nose. "And besides, why would the likes of you be searchin' for a strange lookin' fella like that? They mean troubles, you know… If your gramps were around he'd…"

But his words fade in the distance as Rey disappears down the rest of the steps.

Two more people shake their head at her by the time she reaches the port. One of them is Miss Netal, blowing a stream of smoke through blood red lips as she leans against her doorframe. A man slips out swiftly, buckling his belt and keeping his eyes low.

"I would have known if a man like that were roaming around, sweetheart," she curls her lips at her. Bracelets jingle as she brings her cigarette to her lips. "Would have pitied him enough to make sure he stayed nice and warm for the night."

Rey's stomach churns at the woman's teasing. She stops to catch a breath at the end of the road, tears stinging her eyes.

The universe is telling her she's too late. That he has already vanished undersea and there's no point in chasing after shadows. That it would be best to finally let go.

Only she can't...

Every single fabric of her existence screams for her to go on. Not to give up. But in what direction? Which way should she go?

He could have gone anywhere...

_"Where did you find your clothes anyway?"_

_He looks down at them curiously._

Rey snaps her head up.

She knows exactly where to look.

She reaches the beach she had first found him at before she knows it, running on coarse sand that grates at her bleeding feet. The sea foams this dawn. It’s restless and upset, with large grey waves crashing on the rocks. Αn old shipwreck lies in the distance, half-buried in the sand, its rotting wood creaking with every gust of wind. She spots a man disappearing into the waters next to it.

“Kylo!” she yells at the top of her voice, rushing towards him as fast as her legs can carry her.

The man turns at the sound of her voice. She can practically see his eyes go wide when he spots her.

And suddenly everything goes still.

The winds fall.

The rushing clouds of the storm slow down.

The waves quiet and their foam disappears.

It’s as if the whole world is holding its breath.

“Rey?”

“Wait!” she pants, devouring the small distance that remains between them. “Wait, please wait…” She’s upon him in a breath, splashing into the waters to reach him.

His black eyes roam her face hungrily. “Why are you here? You should go back.”

“I want to know the truth...” she pants.

“What truth?”

“Of who you are!” Her words carry over the stillness of the air, resonating on rocks and cliffs. He watches her with an intensity that penetrates her heaving chest. “You have powers that go beyond logic, powers that no creature can ever have on land or sea. You are so much more than what you have made me believe… Please, don’t lie to me anymore…”

His face darkens and he tears his eyes from hers, raising them at the silence of the sky. Something in the way he stares at the clouds reminds her of an ageless creature that has become too tired of the world. A facade slips away, a mask she didn’t realize was there before. It unveils something that she can’t quite place.

Something familiar.

“I only a man wanting a woman I am not allowed to keep,” he drawls quietly. “Nothing else matters.”

“Of course it matters. If it didn’t matter then why did you give me this?” She turns her head to the side, pulling her hair away from her neck to reveal his bite. “Why did you if you didn’t want me to join you?”

He returns his gaze to her, dark and cryptic like the deepest abyss of the waters he comes from. She waits for his answer, although she knows the reasons behind what he did. He wanted to turn her. He wanted to make her a sea creature. The problem is that he never bothered giving her the choice.

She should be furious with him.

“You love being human. I cannot take that away from you.”

“But you already have—and you didn’t even give me the choice. You simply made the decision for me.”

His eyes turn the darkest shade of sorrow she has ever seen. "You still not understand… The choice you speak of, is still in your hands, but you too afraid to make it. You too afraid to love a monster."

Rey’s heart stutters. She feels like the sand is giving out on her.

_"It is the way..."_

The winds pick up, and ripples appear in the calm sea. The breeze ruffles his black hair carrying his sigh.

“I must go back,” he says. “I can no longer stay.” His voice is deep, echoing over the waters. It sounds as if the whole sea is becoming his voice.

He turns his back to her without another glance. Without one word of goodbye.

Something inside her swells with anger. Tears pool in her eyes and Rey clenches her hands into fists.

“You say I’m too afraid to love a monster,” she calls to him. “But you are too afraid to be loved as one. Is that why you became a man?”

He pauses, the muscles of his back going rigid.

“Is that why you run away from me so easily?”

He turns his head over his shoulder, but he can’t meet her eyes.

“Is that why you’re running away from me now?” she whispers. “Because you believe I can’t love you for who you are? Because you believe I wouldn’t choose you?”

She moves further into the water, teeth beginning to chatter as she becomes immersed in it. She’s close enough to touch his shoulder, but she doesn’t dare. His body is heaving, short wild breaths signifying the state he’s in. She knows she has hit her mark. Now it’s up to him.

“Turn around,” she says softly. “Look at me.”

He does so, slowly. The rose color on his cheeks fades away, and his skin tone loses its human warmth. A porcelain paleness takes over. He has his eyes shut, but Rey knows the color she will come across. All trace of humanity from him is gone.

All except for one.

Rey sets her palm on his chest.

The wild beat of his heart.

“I love you,” she says. “I have always loved you… Part of me has always known.”

His eyes remain closed, aching anticipation radiating from him, barely contained. “And what else you know?”

“That your love is eternal. It holds no boundaries...”

"What else?"

She lowers her voice. “That you have come for me before… That we are bound in ways that go beyond my understanding of this world.”

“This world not understand the chains I carry.”

“No, it doesn’t,” she caresses the cool skin of his face, and the brow that shadows his smooth features. A strand of white hair runs down his mane now, a mark that wasn't there before. Perhaps for his time sacrificed as a man. “But I do. I want to…If you will let me...”

He opens his eyes—glowing brighter than the sun. His hands clasp her face eagerly.

"Do you mean what you say?"

"Yes. Every word."

"Are you certain?"

"I am," she nods fervently.

He sighs and a cool breeze caresses her skin. “I have come for you for eons," he breathes softly. "You have been my one and only for lifetimes...”

For some reason, Rey has known that as well. She also knows that she has not always chosen him. And that his years of loneliness have devoured fleets and eaten away at land and rocks.

But not this time.

She smiles widely, with tears falling from her eyes. She cups his hands as he leans in to capture her lips. He kisses her soundly, passionately holding her in his claws like his most frail possession. Rey wraps her arms around him, holding on tight so he will never let her go again. Their tongues meet eagerly, with a story of their own to tell.

He is a tempestuous being, her merman, with too many emotions stirring in his heart. It pounds beneath her hand, a solid familiar beat that she can recognize and follow.

When he pulls away, to see her, to read all that she feels for him in her eyes, Rey touches the tender skin on her neck. His gift to her for the undersea.

“I am ready now. Take me with you.”

He presses his forehead to hers for a moment drinking her in. Then he wraps her in his liquid embrace and pulls her under.

Rey watches the sky disappear in swirls of grey and pearls of water, knowing that no lowly mortal creature or mighty eternal divinity in the world can exist without the yearning for a companion in their heart. That even in the deepest, most inaccessible parts of the ocean, a fire burns for a love long-awaited.

Rey takes in a breath.

She takes in the Sea.

***

Stories never fail to rise following strange, unexplainable disappearances. Especially in small, secluded communities such as a sea village tucked in a forgotten corner of the world, and for a girl as unique and different as Rey.

Maz has heard plenty of them in her life.

These days they speak of a girl that ran off with some shabby guy that had stopped by their village for a night or two. The type that go around with a backpack on their shoulders traveling from country to country and discovering the world—or some similar excuse of the kind, in order to escape the obligations of life for a bit.

Others say she came across a horrible fate at the hands of a criminal, and that her body was buried in the woods, never to be found.

But most voices whisper of an ending too sorrowful to talk about out loud, even in the most private discussions. They talk of her lifeless body being swept away by the currents of the sea, and lying at the bottom of the ocean amongst black pearls, a swollen, decaying pile of flesh and bones for creatures of the sea to feast upon.

Everyone says she was not herself lately.

Everyone but Maz…

Maz believes otherwise. But why should anyone pay attention to a blind, shriveled up old witch with nothing better to do than pretend she can see the future? No one in their right mind would do that, right?

Maz raises her chin as sunlight breaks through the passing clouds to warm up her face. A light breeze caresses her wrinkled face, carrying moisture from the sea. The playful thrashing of water against rocks almost lulls her to sleep. It's a delightful spring day, buzzing with life and blooming wildflowers, and Maz couldn't be happier to be sitting on the sand with her aching feet dipped in the cool waters.

Waiting.

She knows they will come. The sea wears the brightest blue colors when they do, and it sparkles with joy, regardless of the time of year. Maz can sense the anticipation thrumming all around her. She knows the mellow seasons won’t last forever, and that harsh winters, angry waves and howling winds will return one day. For such is the cycle of life and death, and every lifeform is bound to it. Even the gods.

It is the curse they carry...

A deep baritone rumble shakes the earth momentarily, and a ripple of waves follow.

Maz holds her breath...

The sudden splashing of water makes her nearly jump out of her skin. Some form of sea creature lands on her lap. Maz smiles, reaching her hands to feel her gift. An octopus. Not bad. It will make a delicious meal for the day cooked in a touch of red wine and daphne leaves.

A woman's light laughter trickles to her ears.

The Sea hums with excitement.

Maz's smile widens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cannot thank you enough, my friends, for following this tiny story and sharing your thoughts. 
> 
> It's not a conventional forever after, I know...
> 
> It's a story greatly inspired by ancient myths, folklore about the mermaid sister of Alexander the Great, and fairytales my grandmother would tell me of nymphs stealing eyesight from unlucky passerbys. All that wrapped in scents of the Mediterranean I grew up in, that I can only hope I was able to share with you.
> 
> Stay safe in these crazy times. Love plenty. And may we cross paths again ❤


End file.
